Saturday | February 04, 2012
5 Tips for Tricky Situations with Friends & Money
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By
Julie and Robbie Hyman
19 March 2010
As a young person, you probably find it difficult enough to save money and have it handy when you need it. But money gets a lot more complicated when friendship and peer pressure come into play.
Here are some tips to help you avoid some of the trickiest situations.
1. Don’t lend money
Lending money can ruin a friendship. If your friend doesn’t pay you back, you’ll probably start to resent that friend. And believe it or not, your friend might even get mad at you.
Every time he sees you, your friend will remember that he hasn’t kept the promise that goes with borrowing money. Your friend will feel guilty—and that guilt can turn into anger at you. Have a policy of no lending.
2. Have your “I don’t lend” phrase ready
Sometimes we get talked into lending money because we can’t think of a way to say no. If a friend asks for a loan and you say, “I don’t have cash,” that might end it. But what if your friend asks, “Can you bring it tomorrow?”
This is where having a standard phrase can help. Anytime someone asks to borrow money from you, simply say, “Sorry. Promised my parents I wouldn’t lend money. Can’t go back on my word.”
3. Don’t borrow money
There are two scenarios for borrowing money: one where you can repay it right away but just don’t have the cash on you, and one where you don’t know when you’ll be able to repay the money. Never borrow under the second scenario.
Out with friends at dinner but left your wallet at home? As long as you have the cash, go ahead and borrow $20 from a friend. But write yourself a note on a napkin to repay your friend right away, or email yourself a reminder from your cell phone. Don’t borrow money unless you can repay it immediately. It’s not worth the risk to your friendship.
4. Don’t be competitive about buying things
This is a trap that advertisers set for you. They want you feeling the need to have the latest, the coolest, the most expensive… everything! They want you feeling the need to impress and stay ahead of your friends. Don’t.
You can’t win this game. There will always be some newer, cooler thing—and you’ll have to get that too. Eventually you’ll run out of money. And what will you have to show for it? Just a bunch of stuff that isn’t so cool anymore.
Buy things because you’ll enjoy them, not because you want to keep up.
5. Don’t be jealous of other people’s money
How do you know that someone who has more stuff than you is happier than you are? You’ve seen the richest celebrities in our society overdose on drugs, go to jail for drunk driving, even commit suicide.
There’s no point in being jealous about what someone else has. Focus on what you have—and enjoy it.
Julie Hyman and Robbie Hyman are marketing professionals and authors of the forthcoming book Money Savvy Teen. Have a question? Email: robbie@moneysavvyteen.com
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